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Buffet of Belief

Honestly, I don’t believe in much.
Politics, education, religion and such.
Not people, not opinions, not emotions.
Not music, not art, not literature.
Not talent, psychology, or social norms.
And I’ve only recently begun my journey to God,
And I know He knows my heart,
Faith has never been my strong point.
My Achilles’ heel has always been my lack of concern
I yearn for a heart that burns and cares for positive,
But most of the time I’m just stuck in the negative.
Criticizing.
Ostracizing.
And half the time I don’t even truly care.
I pray for a woman who I can run my fingers through her hair,
But in all honesty even in that my heart isn’t there.
Consistently.
I don’t even trust in conspiracy theories,
Although they tend to resonate a little more clearly,
But truth barely even exists,
And it seems that “truth” changes yearly.
I have the brain of an empiricist,
The soul of a believer.
The heart of Quixote
And the patience of a meat cleaver,
Hoisted high above a chopping block.
I’m a straight up guy.
No frills, no lies, no games.
And because of so I’m limited in my frames,
Of thought.
See I don’t fake it til I make it.
Or see the good in playing the role.
I don’t see the need in portraying an image,
When I don’t live it in my soul.
I don’t believe in most things,
Because I haven’t found the satisfaction to make me whole.
Finding that truly gratifying sustenance…
Well that’s the larger goal.

FKJR

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